What’s the best advice for new parents? 6 things to know
As soon as a couple has a baby, they’re often inundated with people offering well-intended advice. For new parents, this can be overwhelming to the extreme. You’ve just brought home your newborn and want to decompress, but instead, you’re fielding outdated tips from your aunt and moderating a breastfeeding debate in the Facebook comment section of your birth announcement.
Beyond the unsolicited advice of others, you’ll definitely have questions of your own that need answering. There are lots of uncertainties in the first few years of parenthood (or most of parenthood!) so it makes sense that you’ll be looking for guidance now and again.
Whether your little one isn’t sleeping well or you’re confused about dressing them properly, it’s completely normal to doubt yourself. Add the conflicting opinions of friends and family into the mix and it can feel like you’re doing everything wrong.
If you’re feeling defeated, don’t worry—that’s a natural experience for every parent, and we’re here to reassure you that you’re doing great, mama! And if you’re seeking practical advice that can make a big difference as a new family, these six insights will help you on your journey.
Advice for your little one
Since parenting doesn’t come with a how-to manual, first-time moms and dads are often flying blind as they navigate their new lives. We’re all doing the best we can, and every baby is different, so there’s no single “correct” style of parenting. There are, however, good rules of thumb to live by as you settle into your roles as mom and dad.
Feed, sleep, repeat
Babies primarily eat and sleep. Thankfully, this stage is as predictable as it gets, though that doesn’t always translate to being easy. Newborns can have issues with latching or digestion that impede their feeding schedule. Also, they don’t yet have their own circadian rhythm for better sleep, so nap time can be unpredictable and fussy.
Because of this, it’s also the best time to establish strong foundations for your child’s sleep. If they’re fighting sleep or sleeping too much, it may mean something else is going on. In general though, your newborn will simply eat, sleep, and poop their way through the next few months, and you’ll be hanging on tight along for the ride.
The dos and don’ts list
A big source of stress for new parents is their baby’s health and wellness—and it should be! This vulnerable little creature is completely dependent on you, which is downright terrifying. It’s not unusual to have a WebMD tab open at all times in the beginning. But what should you do or not do? That can be very subjective, and you’ll need to find out what works best for your family and your child.
More specific worries like crib safety guidelines are easier to resolve. Baby sleep is actually a complex process and it takes time to familiarize yourself with the ins and outs. All in all, patience and a bit of skepticism for the absolutist advice are assets for new parents, as is a dependable pediatrician who can keep you up to date on the latest trends and best practices.
Advice for your relationships
Anyone who knows a new mom also knows that she’s beyond busy. Priorities shift, which can leave everyone outside of your home on hold for a while. It’s perfectly normal, of course, and bonding with and caring for your baby takes precedence right now. Still, it’s good to recognize when to accept help and how to strike a balance that works for you and your close relationships.
Lean on loved ones
The first several months of your baby’s life are usually spent at home as you both adjust to your new routine together. This is a safe and necessary process, but it might be a little too isolating without adequate support, so it’s beneficial to call upon those friends and family members you trust who will make things easier for you as a new mom.
Asking for assistance is hard, but what’s even harder is going it alone when you’re struggling. Your partner and support network are key to your well-being. Make time for fun breaks with your tribe to keep those connections healthy and growing. A baby-friendly get-together such as a group stroller walk goes a long way after being cooped up at home for so long.
Balance your schedule
Since the days and weeks blur into each other with a new baby in the house, it’s obviously tough—even impossible—to tend to your social life on top of everything else. Manage your schedule by keeping a calendar nearby to track baby’s appointments, milestones, and even their average awake windows as well as your own activities.
This enables you to anticipate future obligations so that you can plan on those activities in order to maintain your marriage. For instance: the occasional date night, where you’ll have to coordinate with grandma to babysit. If there’s one nugget of advice for new parents that rings true almost universally, it’s to balance your full plate by accepting that help!
Advice for yourself
So many mamas run themselves ragged trying to do things perfectly from the moment they carry their little one through the front door. It’s okay—none of us are perfect, and holding yourself to that standard will only lead to burnout and disappointment. In reality, caring for yourself is just as important as caring for your newborn.
Stay flexible
One way to prevent a perfectionist mindset as a new parent is to stay flexible in your approach. This means you’re able to roll with the punches and adapt to unexpected changes or unfamiliar situations. Parenthood itself is inherently unexpected and unfamiliar, even for the most prepared people, and your mental health may suffer if you’re too rigid about things.
A rescheduled check-up with the pediatrician or poorly timed blowout diaper accident (then again, are they ever well-timed?) can be all it takes to ruin a new parent’s day if they’re stretched too thin in those early months. Focus on keeping a positive outlook by being flexible to minimize the chances of feeling exasperated.
Give yourself grace
Finally, this is one of our best pieces of advice for new parents: don’t forget to give yourself grace during this tumultuous period. You cannot pour from an empty cup! Prioritizing self-care now ensures that you’ll be at your best and ready for the next exciting chapter to come. Just like your infant needs adequate sleep, nutrition, and love, so do you.
Getting enough rest with a newborn is challenging, to say the least, but making a point to improve your sleep quality (and quantity) through conscientious efforts will set you up for success. Also, an underrated aspect of sleeping well is managing your environment. If your body is passing out but your bedroom is screaming “wake up!” then you’re never going to make the most of your opportunity to recharge. Regardless, go easy on yourself and apply the same love you have for your newborn to you!
Advice for sleeping soundly as a family
Though people are quick to dole out advice for new parents, your family’s experience is unique. No amount of well wishes can truly capture the thrilling rollercoaster ride that is parenthood. But if you’re concerned about your newborn’s sleep habits, a pediatric sleep consultation could be life-changing.
From common conundrums to particular problems, our team of qualified experts helps young children and babies sleep better. We care about your family’s rest and want to share the relief and joy that comes with sleeping well as an entire household!
Our advice? Consult with us today to see just how valuable sleep coaching can be. Your newborn will grow into a healthy and hygienic sleep pattern with this supplemental support from the start. My Sweet Sleeper is here for you, and with a little guidance, you’ll be parental pros in no time!
Related articles:
Supporting a mom who just had a baby
Signs you have postpartum anxiety and ways to help.
Laying healthy foundations for sleep in the fourth trimester.
