As a new parent, it is probably true that bedtime feels a little less structured than you hoped it would be. The days tend to blur together into a series of feedings and unpredictable sleep times, leaving bedtime to fluctuate each day and routine feeling near impossible.

Although your baby actually sleeps a lot in the first few months of life, it is not the type of consolidated sleep that would allow for a full night's rest - for either of you. So you might be thinking: What is the point of going through a bedtime routine if my baby will just be awake in an hour?

I hear you, Mama, and I want you to know one very important thing about establishing a bedtime routine with your baby: It will actually make your night-time so much easier.

Even at a young age, your baby is starting to form her own sleep habits. As time goes on, she will learn to distinguish daytime and nighttime sleep and her body will start to operate on a 24-hour sleep cycle. Even though it might not feel like it now, starting to establish healthy sleep habits, like a bedtime routine, can make a good impact on her sleep overall.

When babies (and older children too) have consistency and a sense of what is coming next, it can help them to feel safe and secure. Forming a routine around bedtime also helps to prepare your baby for sleep and gives you the opportunity to bond with her.

Here are a few steps to take into consideration as you establish a bedtime routine for your baby (and even if your baby is older and hasn’t followed a routine, it is never too late to start!)

1) Choose a time that is age appropriate is natural to your baby’s sleep cycle

While there are recommendations for when your baby’s bedtime should be based on age, your child will also usually show you signs that she is feeling sleepy during a certain time frame each night (rubbing eyes, fussing, yawning, etc). Catching her in that window (or even before) is important in order to avoid an overtired baby. If you know your baby normally starts acting tired around 7pm, you may want to consider starting to help her wind down, and starting her bedtime routine around 6:30pm in order to help prepare her for rest.

2) Establish a routine in a calm environment

Throughout the day, your baby is exposed to a lot of stimulating activities. She is experiencing a lot of exciting firsts and learning so many new things. The best thing we can do for our bodies (even as adults) is to calm down and feel relaxed before sleep. Some examples of this are reading softly to your baby, singing, rocking her, and shooshing in her ear. Of course basic things such as brushing teeth, a diaper change, and bath time are also a part of your nightly routine, I recommend starting off with these earlier in the routine rather than trying to transition straight from splashing around in the bath to laying in her crib.

3) Ease In

There is no need to try and implement everything at once, and the best approach to take is a gradual one. You might find that your baby doesn't respond to each part of the routine the way you expect and that you find yourself two steps in and she is already asleep (a girl can dream). Try to be patient with yourself and with your baby during this process.

4) Use healthy sleep props

The use of a pacifier, sleep sack/swaddle, and white noise are all objects that your baby can connect to sleep, helping to promote independent sleep and self-soothing during and after your nightly routine.

5) Be consistent as possible

Once bedtime starts to feel like a natural process, your baby will actually want to go to sleep at this time. Amazing, right? Our biological clocks become used to falling asleep and waking at similar times each day, and while I encourage practicing the 80/20 rule with sleep (having a consistent nap and bedtime schedule at least 80% of the time), it is important to try and stick to your child's bedtime most of the time. This might mean occasionally leaving a family dinner early to get home, or saying no to a late night activity in order to prioritize your baby’s sleep.

Establishing a bedtime routine isn't going to happen overnight (pun intended) and there will likely be adjustments made along the way. But once you start to incorporate the routine that works for you and your baby, you are already on your way to a happy and healthy sleeper!

For more information about newborn sleep, check out our newborn sleep course.

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